Home from the Hospital

It amazes me that a short 4 days ago, our little boy's heart was stopped...being repaired, and now we're home. The miracle of modern medicine is something that I will never again take for granted. We're so fourtnate that we live in the U.S.--first and foremost. We're also blessed to live in one of the most advanced medical cities--Birmingham. I made a career decision to keep us here 2.5 years ago. Had I gone the other way, we'd have gone through this alone and at distance from our families.

This experience has been surreal. I caught myself several times comprehending that our child had open heart surgery. I honestly pictured such challenges as some far off thing that other families had to deal with--almost like it was something they brought on themselves. I guess I have been judgmental (for some weird reason). I was wrong to ever think that.

These scary experiences really are a way for God to show his glory. I have fought those type of situations in my life--because they are often painful and unwelcomed. When YOU set a goal and the process is painful (for example, training for a marathon), often you have a big payoff at the end. If you finish the race, all the pain is worth it. I get that. I do that.

What I haven't got for a long time is that God does the same thing. The pain (like in physical training) does things for you that you can't see. And, the payoff isn't about you at all. It's bringing you closer to the one who started this for you. The "goal" is intangible and not at all "performance" oriented--like finishing the marathon. Seeing that such experiences can have big payoffs is a paradigm shift for me. It's the kind of payoff I could never conceive. It's the ultimate in letting go of control. I have grown to trust God more the last 3 months. Even though he gave us a child with a condition I didn't want--I trust him. He has shown his might and power in amazing ways that I wouldn't have seen otherwise.

David, a high school friend of mine, reminded me recently that if you believe that God's good in all things, then you have to believe it FULLY. So, in the pain and in the joy, God's good. I'm starting to understand this better.

I also get sense of what can happen when God's people pray. We'll never know how many people have prayed for us this week. There are literally hundreds--if not in the thousands of you that have lifted us up. Churches in different states that have had us on prayer lists. Your prayers ultimately brought upon God's will. They were answered with resounding "yeses." I'm relieved and thrilled that our son has made it through this big hurdle. But, the strange thing is that I get the sense that God would have been just as present if all this hadn't gone so well.

I covet your prayers of intercession for the next 6 weeks. There are serious risks that Jonathan has. We've got to watch fluid build up and his breathing vigilantly. His breastbone is broken from the procedure. It's wired shut, but we've got to be very careful. An interesting note, he has 27 staples closing this incision on his chest. I find it fascinating--not upsetting. If you're interested, email me. I'll send you a picture now. Otherwise, I'll wait to post pictures of that until it heals up some more.

Sue, Julie's mom, went home yesterday. All of you should call her 'St. Sue'. She was wonderful--basically ran our house this week. I will never be able to thank her enough for her love and help. She did the same thing when Jonathan and Jackson were born. Thank you, Sue. You being here was a balm for Julie and I.

I'll continue to post updates and thoughts. This picture below is from this morning... at home after his 'breakfast'.

Jamie