Rest of January and February

I have said this before and I will say it again. I often blog in my head and think of all these things I want to record. However, I fear a new parent with a child with Down syndrome is reading and may become discouraged by what I say. If you read our blog and see lapses in updates, it is either because we are super busy and I am exhausted or I am discouraged. Know that most of the things I say about Jonathan are as a result of his particular personality and are complicated by DS, not caused by it necessarily.
January and February were particularly isolating and challenging months. We began potty training with gusto. We found that Jonathan can indeed use the bathroom but chooses not to. We have also discovered that, when bored, both Joel and Jonathan go into "destructo" mode. We knew this before but as Joel gets older and more capable of matching Jonathan in his destructive abilities, it becomes incredibly maddening. I understand the term "witching hour" better than I ever have. On the plus side, Joel is enamoured with the potty and has made several successful pit stops. He may be trained before Jono.:)
After seven years of leading a Small Group at church, we finally dissolved our class. Everyone was going in different directions and it was time to call it quits. I so looked forward to it (probably more than anyone there) because I rarely got interaction with other adults without kids around. Since we have stopped meeting and because the weather has been so cold, I have been very isolated. I finally realized this and, at my women's minister's prodding, joined a Biblestudy on Wednesday mornings. I take Joel and get to participate in a study with other women. I think this may be the first time in four years I have been able to attend a study. It is rare that we all get to go to church on Sunday mornings because someone is usually sick. So, if I cannot attend church, it is nice to know that I can do this study come Wednesdays.
Joel is already matching Jonathan on many levels and surpassing him. It is bizarre to watch. Joel mimics Jonathan's incorrect speech, but Jonathan's speech therapist said not to worry. Joel can feed himself better and more neatly than Jonathan. Joel can operate toys with more precision than Jonathan. It is a reminder to me that Jonathan indeed has lower muscle tone and while he needs to be held to a high standard, sometimes he truly cannot accomplish the same things without help or without being clumsy.
Jonathan is learning to write his name at school. Currently, he writes "Jo" by himself. Had we been thinking, we would have named Jonathan "Joel"! He will get to it. I am confident. I try to get him to practice this each day before we paint. I am going to be working on this and other things this summer so he is as prepared as possible for kindergarten in the fall.
Jonathan's speech continues to develop. He is saying many words and each are becoming more clear. I have hope that one day he will speak very clearly. He does not use the potty unless I prompt him. However, he will stay dry until I take him. I was spoiled because Jackson was trained in three days with hardly any accidents after that and no pull ups. This has been so hard. But, then, I look around and notice my friends with other hardships in their lives and remind myself that things could be worse. I have realized, too, not to discount my suffering - it is my suffering and just because there are worse things out there doesn't mean that what we endure "counts less." 
Jackson recently told us that he was disturbed by how much Jonathan gets into trouble. This revealed to us that we need to handle Jonathan's discipline differently. We explained that Jonathan has to be punished so that he will learn to stop his behaviors but it takes him longer to learn. We also realized that we needed to be more patient and to separate our frustration with Jonathan's behavior from other goings on (i.e. don't let anger from dealing with Jonathan tinge our voice when address other matters).
Jackson continues to use his imagination constantly. He cannot stop talking about imaginary stories and characters he has made up. He loves to construct plots and story lines and describe every moment. He also is a great help with his brothers. While he also is frustrated with their destruction, he loves them and can be very sweet. I think it is tough to be Jonathan some days and tough to be Jackson others. 
We have had a few warm days and I cannot say how that has improved my disposition. It has been wonderful to get outside. Our street can be busy and I still find it alarming to be outside and have one of the kids run toward the street. We plan to put our house on the market again. Please pray that it will sell if God wills it. If we stay here, we hope to fence in the back yard and start some improvements to direct the boys to the back yard and away from the street in the front yard.
Julie:)